Why, regardless of the busy season at work I’m currently suffering, summertime gets me totally nuts and routines seem to be on vacation?
Everything seems turn upside down. Not only the things I do on a daily basis, but also my weight, my hair, eating habits, and moreover, sleeping hours, lack of savings and booze.
Will I get back to normal at some point? Of course I will, but it will happen for no reason. Guess weather affects human being more than we think. The weirdest of all is that I used to become super lazy in Summer, but nowadays I’m pretty much nonstop. I had to force myself to calm down a bit few weeks ago, otherwise I was gonna fall ill for sure, and ruined too. At this point in mid August, gotta admit I’m much exhausted, mainly mentally, due to work overload.
Enough complaining! On the positive side of the coin, I’m enjoying really good times with my friends, and even at work, in the middle of chaos, we have much much fun. Please, don’t misunderstand me, I’m happy at my office, it’s just peak season combined with my partners holidays is hard to endure sometimes.
I’m not sure the aim of this post, if there is one. First I’ve started thinking of cocktails, then about how everything is being random and chaos lately, and finally, 5 minuted ago, I’ve remembered something happened on FB.
I don’t usually pay much attention to ads pages or friends suggested. I’m interested in my friends’ stuff, bands updates, pix and that kind of stuff. Birthdays calendar is a good reminder sometimes, although I have already my alarms set for them.
Anyway, wasting my time on FB as usual, all of a sudden I started to see status flashbacks of previous years. How much “memory” has FB got? Not sure, but it sounded a bit scary to me. Truth is my status show some kind of mood in the time, but I’m not super explicit as almost to write down my account number (believe it or not, I’m exposing part of my life here, but privacy settings on my profile are high) or describe that I’ve just farted.
Well, first status I saw was dated on the same day, back in 2009. Quite average, it read “summer watching”…good ol’ summer days working for Damco! From time to time I kinda miss those years.
Second flashback experience made me feel that knot on the stomach, a Guns n’ Roses song title, one of my favorite although many people agrees is rubbish, Estranged. Uh uh! Me no like that. A rollercoaster of memories started passing by at the speed of sound. Yeah, man, one year ago I was fucked up to the max! you know one month ago I was making some balance of the past year, on purpose. To recover tough and sad memories all of a sudden by chance is another thing. Didn’t feel very well because this reminded me my state of mind and heart were pending on a loose rope for a couple of months keeping the hope at some point everything could get back to “normal” somehow. My mistake, sometimes I’m so innocent I think of myself being in the middle of a nightmare to be stopped as soon as I shake my head. You know what the end was, and I don’t complain nowadays, but hell! I could have saved some pain.
Fortunately I’m in a positive mood and am able to twist the thing as to put an end to this crap in an optimistic way. No matter I’m anxious and stressed lately, nor I’m swearing on some people’s mothers 8 hours a day… when I leave the office I’m fine, don’t feel lonely nor despised, and can sleep without nightmares, I can be tired, upset, happy or horny among others, but fortunately not feeling related to such an state as Estranged anymore.
estrange /ɪˈstreɪn(d)ʒ, ɛ-/
- 1 cause to feel less close or friendly; alienate.
- 2 (as adj. estranged) (of a husband or wife) no longer living with their spouse.
Arrrgh! For better or worse I’m more in Get in the Ring mood 😉