Tag Archives: friends

Flashback Friday: London 2015

Argh! It’s been two weeks already since I don’t update this site and I feel like shit about it, but honestly I wasn’t in the mood nor didn’t find the right time to do so, and the past days have been so weird my mind was to stressed to write. I hate when I have this shitty writer’s block. One of the reasons I keep this blog alive it’s because it usually works as some sort of funnel.

On this day two weeks ago I was having a veggie burger and a tasty spicy Turkish salad with my friend Veronica near Old Street in London. We came back to this beloved city again to attend a Ryan Adams show at Hammersmith Apollo on Friday 27th and the trip was amazing. Now there’s no point in talking about  the show, which was a blast, nor how great was to meet friends who were also spending the weekend there for the same reason, so instead I’m posting some pix of that wonderful time .

tetis

apollo

foreros

ryan4

setlist ryan adams

ryan5

crobar

vero

pints and postcards

Thanks to all the people who contributed to a weekend of laughs, lots of pints of beer, friendship and happiness. Now it seems to be ages ago, but it was fantastic.I love you! ❤

B.F.F

Been having a couple of beers on my own tonight after meeting a friend. I’ve noticed this is some sort of ritual, to have some dinks on my own the previous night to new year’s eve. Listening to music, deep in thoughts. Kind of nostalgic state of mind I guess.

Most likely I’ll write about 2014 highlights in the next days, but I have something, or better said, someone in my mind I’d like to say thanks for being by my side, especially during this weird year. I’m talking about my friend Jaume. My best friend.

jaumie and toi

Few days ago I was saying that since a while ago years pass by and they are not extraordinary. Not full of sadness and pain as in 2010 nor feeling as if I was on the top of the world like in 2011. For good or bad, there are events out of my control which can affect my life deeply, and years have become a rough mixture of good and bad things. I reckon being on my own has also made me feel in a way that I’m my own engine and source of energy, and try to make the most of it, and friends and other stuff contribute to improve or get things worse.

I don’t feel sad and lonely in general even though I sometimes have these feelings, but at the end of the day, after 4 years, it’s me who I’m going to sleep with and wake up with every fuckin’ day. And after 4 years I can confirm friends and music are definitely essential for me to stay alive and kicking.

I met Jaume on the net, in a crappy music chat, arguing about some band till we reached a common point which acted as the ignition to our friendship. We met at a bar one night after I called him asking for a pack of cigarettes, and from that moment, everything went on wheels between us.

Like we say, we’ve supported each other at the time of leaving some corpses behind. We fell and then stood up and moved forward, always having each other to overcome whatever shit we had to face.

Our friendship has strengthened, grown and settled, we can count each other for everything without even asking, and we know what’s happening to the other just with a glance or a stupid talk. I tell him absolutely everything and I know he’ll always tell me if I’m wrong. At my weakest peaks he’s given me the support and guidance not to lose the track, and he’s my anchor to good sense whenever I’ve thought I was falling into a sea of insanity.

For the talks, the endless beers and cigarettes, the laughs and the care during all these years I can’t be grateful enough to Jaume but I still wanna say thanks.

My life would be a huge pile of shit if you weren’t here.

INTERNET, SOCIAL NETWORKS AND NEW FRIENDS

I’ve never denied the fact that I’m addicted to internet, and never had a problem to admit it. Since I signed in my first e-mail account in January 31, 2000, and started discovering the possibilities of the net, I’ve been using and abusing.

Guess I discovered it in the most appropriate time for myself. I had just got back from UK and was in my hometown again, limited by a standard city, so quiet and relaxing compared to London, and limited in terms of rock and culture agenda, there were moments I used to feel suffocated. You have to understand I had met so many people in a big city and enjoyed this anonymous status implied, all of a sudden it seems that I was a prisoner in my own city. Not that I didn’t have friends, because I had and met new ones, but you know, there weren’t many people around sharing same passions and interests as me. I’m talking about rock, of course.

keyboard

I started visiting a cyber cafe close to college to check e-mails from all the friends left behind. You know how these romances start and end. Very intense and constant in the beginning, till they fade out as in a film and people ends up forgetting and feeling lazy. Usual shit. Anyway. I had heard of chat rooms and discovered there was a general one focused on music, so I checked what it was about. My username was LadyEvil, as an American friend used to call me. The beginning was quite disappointing, as the rhythm was frenetic and in order to catch someone’s attention and start interacting it took me some time. But eventually I managed and started visiting the café and spending several hours a day during the week, until I begged my dad to install internet at home.

Since then a new universe opened to me, and I found out it was the perfect way to get acquainted with people from everywhere to share interests, to be updated on anything going on around the world, look for stuff, and learning. You know I’ve talked many times about my friend Jaume, right? I met him in that chat room, and we’ve been friends ever since. Thanks to forums I also started dating theonewhocannotbenamed, met lots of people who have become friends and participated of events. And of course, I’ve learned lots about music, films and useless stuff. Social networks, which are so criticized, have also been good to me. I’ve discovered lots of bands, tattoo artists, helped me to get acquainted with musicians and music journalists and also to stay in touch with friends regardless of our geographical situation. Finally blogs and the possibility of having my own have encouraged my writing as a way of expression I thought it had died when I stopped writing letters.

Even though social networks have always been criticized as killing the actual social life of people, I must say I’ve never felt as much accompanied as I am nowadays. It doesn’t matter I stay home with flu, because someone will interact with me eventually. And at this point, it’s needless to remark my social life is a very active and rich one.

When you are in your 30s and aging, there comes a stage in which lots of people around are in couple, get married or have kids, and it’s difficult to keep up with the relations in the same way as when you were in your 20s. Not only because of family ties but also due to responsibilities at work, schedules and other stuff. Life changes a lot, it’s unavoidable. Friends are not as available as they used to and getting new acquaintances gets more difficult. Well, I’m not talking about that “lonely-people-looking-desperately-for-a-couple-crappy-sites”, but about Twitter for instance, where you start meeting people in your same situation with shit of any kind in common. I know people who love Star Wars, others dig Guns N’ Roses, and others share my passion for tattoos…whatever you might think of, really.

If you are in touch and get on well with people through 140 characters, at some point one of the parts will try to step forward and focus on a more personal (and private) friendship. Then I guess we’d talk about Facebook, the great monster of social networks. Whatever you share is also a reflection of who and how you are, and everybody gets a picture of the real individual they are getting to know. Or it should be like that, unless you’re capable of performing DeNiro 24/7.

And why all this? Just because. Last weekend I finally met this great guy I can call friend now who I met thanks to Twitter nearly two years ago, and the experience was terrific. Prospects that everything worked fine were high, yet, to be honest, I was careful not to have great expectations to keep from feeling disappointed, but the end everything worked awesome, and I enjoyed a fantastic weekend. I only hope it’s been the first of many. For years now I’ve been swallowing bullshit related to all the dangers of internet and blah blah blah… Of course, you gotta be cautious, but you know? Nice people and assholes are everywhere, and the chances to meet them are the same, so, why being so close? Why do people deny and reject the possibility of finding wonderful people in different places? Why are we so stupid and don’t take advantage of the possibilities we have at just a click?

Breezin'

I’m tired of listening to some narrow minded people who still burn my ear saying I’m too hooked to internet and that kind of crap. At least I’m approaching all the chances I have at hand to accomplish my vital target, which is something as simple as enjoying as much as possible.

This been said, thanks Gab, you might be reading this and have a laugh thinking I’m a nutter, but it was great to spend quality time with you, and I’m grateful that you contribute to my search for happiness and fun. Well fuckin’ done!

FRIENDS 2.0

There are many pleasant things in life, of course, but my friends are the most precious treasure I’ve got on Earth. I really feel lucky for having  very loyal ones, and it’s not that I’m too outgoing and regard anyone I can have a couple of beers with as my close friend. Throughout my entire life, especially since I left primary school and started at the public high school, I’ve been cultivating a strong net of friends, and I’m proud to say I’ve done it fine. Perhaps the amount of close friends I have exceeds the average, but believe me, after going through some of those remarkable episodes which build up your own character and define your life, some have been lost in the journey, some others have joined at some point, and there are a bunch of them I know they’ll be by my side for good.

I wanted to write about friendship long time ago but felt it might be a little bit obvious or too affected, and my aim wasn’t to write the typical public a statement to declare I have the best friends in the world and that I love them lots and blah blah blah. I don’t even know whether my friends are the best or not, because all as human beings make mistakes, and I reckon we all fail sometimes (I’m the first one to raise my hand), but they are good enough to me anyway, so I don’t ask for more. Of course it’d be great one of them won lottery and retired me from moving shitty containers but…can’t complain.

When I was a teenager I never stuck to just one group because my hobbies, music mainly, weren’t shared by everybody. This made me start looking for other people I felt more comfortable with when sharing my passions. But that never meant I had to quit my all time friends, if you know what I mean, I’ve always had rock friends, best friends, girl friends, friends for hanging out in weekends, others for attending shows, for attending the movies, summer friends…of course with some of them I can do any activity I feel like(except for sex, that’s SACRED). I like the fact that my friends are so different in taste, hobbies, education and culture, because I can learn and discover lots of stuff from them.

Tracks

Again, life is like a train. There are moments it runs at maximum speed, sometimes it stops for no reason, and there are periods it works in autopilot (no control). There are stages and break points, as the stations, and people step into/out of it in a hurry, quietly, in distress. And this can apply to everything: friends, lovers, jobs, couples, bands you love…whatever.

And why all this? I’m sure you remember when I found my Swedish friend Carl, and how exciting it was to start being in touch after so many years. The experience was a beautiful one and I’m glad we follow each other through social networks and often interact.

This time this recovery of friendship was not so exotic nor dreamy perhaps, but I’m positive it’s gonna be sealed and settled, and I’m very happy about it.

Probably she’s gonna freak out a bit when discovers this post talking about her, but my friend fairly deserves some lines, especially after the insane and fantastic weekend she’s spent as my guest at The Hellhouse.

We used to be very close friends back in the 1990s, and shared lots of experiences. We had 3 main things in common: rock, identical sense of humor, and a natural talent for having fun.  TanTan is one of the funniest people I’ve ever met, another party animal, smart ass and a rock lover. Unfortunately and because of external circumstances and other people’s effect on us, we finally split ways, without arguing nor quarrelling, even physically, as she moved to Madrid, and I started living in Barcelona. Sometimes we met at festivals, but things weren’t the same anymore. All of a sudden I found her on Twitter thanks to a friend in common almost 2 years ago, and, I think we both were ready for a second chance. We started interacting, then trying to find some time in Madrid or Zaragoza, and finally she came to visit me.

After so many years, even though I was positive everything was gonna be fine between us, there was the shadow of the doubt. Perhaps we weren’t so alike anymore, as when you grow old you become more neurotic. We might have changed but those three features we used to share remained not only the same but were even better, and we listened to music, had great and constant laughs, had too much fun and the mixing of serious conversations together with old memories, made of these past 4 days, one of the best weekends in a very long time. Now we’re looking forward to meeting for our birthdays, try to be actively in touch and see each other more often.

Thus this is the short story of another close person who got off my train long time ago, but finally decided to jump back thinking there’s still plenty of moments to enjoy together. We could gather together lots of past memories and stories in a book, which I reckon would be worth reading, but I’m pretty sure the second part will be a great one too.

HERE COME THE KIDS!

News which inevitably cause a rollercoaster of emotions inside your head. Do you know what I’m talking about? Sure you do. THOSE announcements that usually catch you off guard and leave you speechless. I’ve been receiving such news very often recently. At least they were good ones.

You realize you’re getting old for many reasons but this one in particular is like a punch in the face and the ultimate sign of maturity, compromise and responsibility, for the rest of your life. I’m talking about having kids.

I’m 36, and even though my friends’ age varies from one to another a lot, it could be said that, considering or current circumstances and the changes our generations have been facing and assuming, it’s the perfect timing for these established couples in their 30s to strengthen their ties by agreeing the most important compromise in a relationship: creating a family.

Last week I was announced by three friends, two especially close, that they were pregnant.  Not one, not two, BUT THREE.

pregnant

By now if you’ve been following some of my experiences here, you probably know I’m a very sensitive person, and I care for my friends more than I look for myself, or at least I try my best in doing so. Give and you’ll be given, correct? I’m very lucky regarding my friends, and I want the best for them. So when they shared with me such amazing news, I was overwhelmed by  mixture of emotions: happiness, sadness and loneliness and hope.

I know it sounds weird, but there is a reason for that, leaving aside that I’m experiencing a wild PMS this time, and I’m feeling strange lately, mostly due to my current job.

Happiness is the first and most intense feeling to arise. Surprise-shock- euphoria-happiness for real and yess, babies! I’m positive my friends are gonna be excellent mums/dads and will transmit great values to their kids, and the idea of witnessing the birth of these modern families close seems very exciting to me. I really can’t wait to see these little creatures cheering up our reunions. The birth of a baby in these cases means the result of a love story, being a romantic girl, I’m very happy for my friends.

When reading about sadness and loneliness I guess some of you might freak out. This has to do with my personal situation. It’s not that I want to have a baby right now, but I feel sad for not being experiencing such sweet times with someone by my side. And the worst thing is that, having a look around, I don’t see an imminent change in my status. Again I have to stress the fact that I don’t feel desperate for finding a boyfriend, by all means, but events like these make me wonder if someday I will find the right guy to spend some quality time with in a more intimate way. When so much love is around, it’s easy to feel a bit miserable, and odds are against me right now.

DSCN1082

On the other hand, I’m an upbeat girl, and happiness weighs more than sadness, so hope comes back in sight and I’m finally thinking there’s someone waiting for me somewhere, and whatever time it might take, a nice Han Solo like fella will eventually take my hand. This is my consolation, and some kind of motivation.

Some friends have been asking me whether I would have kids, and my reply was simple. Not that I’m mad about it, but it the time came, together with a legal and loving guy, I wouldn’t mind. My ex’s were totally against babies, thus I didn’t stop to think about it, it was out of question.

Anyway, if I don’t have any kid, this post with act was my will and my nephew would inherit my record collection.

Whenever I receive these news I get super excited, and my reaction is normal and within certain limits, however, three pregnancies in a row, confirming there’s a baby boom, have been way too much. I’m super super glad for my girls, and to be honest, for no reason I had this thought of 2013 adding lots a kids in the picture. Should I start considering starting my fortune telling business?

ABOUT PERSEVERANCE…

One year ago, someone who’s not in my life any longer (you can guess who…it’s easy), told me I wasn’t constant with things in my life. Coming from him was like a bad joke, but I’m not the one to judge anybody’s life and choices, especially if deep feelings are involved. Perhaps I should, but I’m not a pushy person, I take things as they go, if I like them I get along, if not, then I move my ass as far as possible.

After the initial shock of such statement, a quick thought came to my mind: I might not be constant with certain obligations, or things which don’t give me enough satisfaction sometimes, what I’m constant with all that matters. I will never forget my answer: listen, XXXX, right now I can name 3 things I’m constant at, which I consider the quite important: You, my friends and my job.

Yes, one of my problems, yet a virtue too, regarding couples, is that I’m so constant I never give up, and sometimes I should, for both my pride and state of mind. I’ve never fired anyone, always hoping everything could improve. Thus, when everything is ruined, I feel like shit thinking I could have put things to an end earlier. At least, I never have the typical regrets thinking  what I did wasn’t enough.

Regarding my friends, they are my life, I’ve told this hundreds of times, but it’s true. I would be nothing without my friends, and you have to treat them the best you can, and that’s a constant thing in my life.

I’m a hard worker. First company related to container business I worked for, during 4 years, I really felt involved with maybe too much. Not that it was an obsession, but issues trespassed the line to my private life. I’m trying this does not happen anymore, but if I have a commitment, and get paid for that, I have to give my best when required. Of course, there are seasons I’m ball scratching, like everybody else, but when stressing peak seasons, such the one I’m currently suffering, are on, I squeeze my brain and do whatever is at hand, meaning overtime, to say the least. I don’t care. Better times are to come.

The subject of perseverance has come to discussion many times among friends. You know, certain statements, despite you clearly disagree with them and know they’re wrong, depending on your state, can affect you a lot. I guess this happened to me, because this frequently comes to my mind.

My friends get upset when I remind them of this moment, they cannot disagree more.

Could you think of 5 things you’re persevering at, right now? And being horny all day long is not valid 😉

I’ve told you three, although one is not currently active. And more have come to my mind, thank God!

A couple of weeks ago, my friend Nefer remarked something that had never occurred to me, the funniest about it is that this is something that has been with me since I was 9 and discovered it was great: English language. Some people can accuse of being a snob, I’m not going to justify myself nor give extra explanations, but that’s complete bullshit.

Little story here. When I was 9, a couple of Americans started to live on the flat next door. The woman, Maria, was actually in her 20’s, and her husband Marc, was in the army (there was a US army base in my hometown those days). She was mos of time on her own, quite bored, and had this awesome portable Pac-man machine she let us play with at the swimming pool in our building. Thus we became friends. She could speak a bit of Spanish, for she was born in Phillipines, and I could say few things in English, so our friendship was one to improve our language skills and mimics. She loved Wham, and had a collection of videos we used to watch every weekend. And then she played me cartoons, which I didn’t understand much, but loved them anyway.

Eventually both families got close, and we used to hang out at the base. That was a blast! Bowling, the coolest swimming pool ever, and for just one dollar, you could get a cheeseburger and play arcade games for long time.

My cousins also lived in a residence area full of Yankees, so they got acquainted with other teeneagers, and soon I was introduced to other kids. Language barrier was a problem I had to sort out, because I wanted to communicate, and know about their culture, understand Teen Wolf and other cool movies… At that point it was decided, I HAD TO learn English.

And since then, English has been a constant in my life. Most stuff I consume is English spoken/written: music, films and books; I studied English philology at college (never finished it though, degree was a crap); stayed in London for a couple of years… After many years I’ve realized, despite my mistakes, I feel more comfortable writing in English, and in both very intimate moments and heavy drunk states, it’s easier for me to express myself in such language. Now you tell me, am I a snob? Well, then I am, and proud of it!

And to end with this, perhaps, nonsense deep thinking of the day, one of the most important constants, which has marked the track to follow for good, music. I’ll never give up on music, and will attend as many gigs as possible as long as I’m physically capable of. Without rock, and music in general terms, I would be a complete different person, probably empty and boring. There’s nothing that can excite me more, or bring out my most extreme emotions. Music can help me to concentrate in certain tasks, can cheer up or depress me, make me laugh and cry, turn me on or get me more aggressive. Music is the law!

Once all this said, I really wanna know, am I constant or not?